The Culture War Lives

A CULTURAL IMPASSE:
My Failed Attempt To Plan A Vacation in Gulf Shores, Alabama

Chat Information: You are now chatting with 'Linda K.'

Linda K: Good afternoon. How may I help you today?

Mr. Trudeau: Hey there, I am wondering if there are any good places to have a Beach-infused Spring Break experience on the Gulf Coast Alabama...this is going to be early March when we go.

Linda K: I am sure you can find something available at that time. How many nights do you plan to stay, and how many will be with you?

Mr. Trudeau: Well, I am wondering if the temperatures will accommodate a beach vacation...and if there will be other young people there out to cut loose

Linda K: Our market is Families--young people will be here with there families--this is not like Panama City Fl.

Mr. Trudeau: So there aren’t any young folks out for booze and loose women/muscley studs?

Linda K: I beg your pardon--no lose women here—

Mr. Trudeau: NONE? I find that hard to believe.

(Prolonged Silence)

Linda K: Is there anything else I can help you with today?

Mr. Trudeau: I mean, I know Alabama is about two centuries behind the rest of civilization but there HAS to be a culture for college kids . . .

Linda K: We are not behind--maybe you should be looking for something other than what you mentioned.

Mr. Trudeau: Well I mean, I’m young so I do the things young people do. You know?

Linda K : We have a great beach resort--lots of things to do for fun and great seafood restaurants.

Mr. Trudeau: That’s great! I love Seafood

Linda K : There is plenty of things to do for the young and young at heart here on the Al. beautiful Gulf Coast.

Mr. Trudeau: I have another question.....I have a Barack Obama bumper sticker on my car...are there any particular herbs or repellents I can put around my car to keep the locals away?

Mr. Trudeau: I think if they saw my car they might think it's some kind of space-ship and be inflamed to rage upon seeing my support for Mr. Obama

Linda K : I do not understand your remarks.

Mr. Trudeau: I just don't want to go there unprepared , I know it's a different culture

Linda K : I think you may be the one with the problem with having a bumper sticker for him. This is a free country--support is your choice.

Linda K : I do know where you are from--but it is not a different culture here from any place I have traveled here in the US

Mr. Trudeau: Yeah....see I just don't want a pitchfork in my tire

Mr. Trudeau: Are there any popular Brothels on the Gulf Coast?

Linda K : I have other people to help that are interested in our area. I have your info so my supervisor can contact you.

Mr. Trudeau: That’s fine

Linda K : Do you need her to contact you?

Mr. Trudeau: sure. email is best, or she can call my cell.

Linda K : You can call her or me free--800-745-7263

Mr. Trudeau:Is it true that in Alabama I can beat up a black man and not go to jail?

Linda K : I am not responding to you any longer

Mr. Trudeau:ONE more thing. And it’s serious.

Linda K: . . . alright.

Mr. Trudeau: I don't like seeing the Ten Commandments Posted publicly, if I call ahead will they cover it up for me by the time I get there?

Chat Information: Chat session was ended by site operator.

Is This Too Much To Ask?