A Confluence Of The Beloved
McSaddle's Buffalo Chicken Bleu Cheese Pizza

I'm a sucker for good buffalo wings with bleu cheese; it's one of my weaknesses. There is something about the heat you get from a good wing-sauce with the rich savory creaminess you get with Bleu Cheese that makes all my toes curl with delight. These are flavors that have earned their way off the Bar Menu, and into my heart.

No, I don't think I'm over-selling it. Fuck you.

What You'll Need

• Sweet Baby Ray's Buffalo Wing Sauce
• Chicken Breast Tenders, sliced thin
• Red Onion
• Red Bell Pepper
• Green Bell Pepper
• Shredded Monterey Jack Cheese (1 cup)
• Smoked Gouda cheese (1/2 Cup)
• Gooey Bleu Cheese Chunks (1/3 Cup)

The Sauce:

1.) On the stovetop mix 1 1/2 cups of Sweet Baby Ray's Buffalo Wing Sauce with 1/3 a cup of flower and 1 cup of Heavy Whipping Cream (half & half or whole milk could work). Whisk while in the pan with the stove on high until all the ingredients blend. Put on low heat

The Chicken

2.) Make a batter out of flower, sea salt, ground pepper, and parsley, cream and one egg. Remember to mix your dry ingredients together in a separate bowl.

3.) Put thawed chicken through a bath of whipped egg and cream and then coat in the dry ingredients. Put each piece in a hot pan with oil.

4.) Once the chicken is cooked all the way through add it to your pan of Buffalo Sauce and stir regularly.

The Crust

5.) Make this how you want, I often use a pre-made crust from Pillsbury. You might consider putting oil on your pan and pre-baking the crust, especially if you have an electric oven.

The Toppings

6.) You should strain your pot of sauce over the crust so you don't dump out your chicken. As with all the toppings it should be heavier on the outside than in the middle.

The base cheese is Monterey Jack. I would feel free to use a whole cup or more. This should go on first.

Add your chicken generously throughout the pizza and put on top of it the thin slices of Gouda.

Finely chop all the vegetables. The smaller and more thin you cut them, the more they will cook, and I'll tell you when you get those red onions to caramelize and you get the red peppers to sweeten you will thank me.

Wherever you don't have a slice of chicken, lay down a chunk of Bleu Cheese.

The Face Of Love

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The McSaddle Daiquiri

I don't know many folks who don't like summer time. Show me one and I will throw a strong drink right in their goddamn face. What I really want to talk about though are the drinks that are too good to throw in anyones face.

Last summer, I gave you recipes for the Redneck Sunrise and the Mennonite Lemonade. I never posted a recipe for the McSaddle Daiquiri, which comes as kind of a surprise to me. I wondered what the heat, humidity, fatigue, workplace irritation, and persistent inebriation had done to me.

Why wouldn't I share this recipe with the world? I think that my readers deserve all the good things I can impart upon them. Especially since they check this blog regularly, often to find little more than pedantic contrived bullshit. Honestly though, I feel as though my poetry has developed.

So, here it is. More such recipes will follow because I think the drink recipe genre is one worth developing. Also, I am working on short fiction so there will be fewer poems and essays.

Feel free to compare and contrast the McSaddle Daiquiri and the Hemingway Daiquiri and make erroneous inferences about that it says about the two men.

McSaddle Daiquiri (For Two)

• 8 shots of Bacardi Coco Coconut Rum
• 2 Cans of Strawberry-Lime Jones Soda
• A large lime
  

Mixing instructions:

Shaker: (Recommended)

1. Fill your shaker 40% to the top with large ice cubes. (The larger the ice, the slower it melts)
   
2. Add rum. (Fresh out of the freezer)
   
3. Add a quarter of a lime's worth of juice.
   
4. Add Jones Soda
5. Shake It All About
6. Rim a good glass with a with a wedge of lime, and garnish.
7. Pour.
8. Drink
9. Enjoy
10. Stumble
11. Apologize
12. Repeat.
    

Blender

1. Add the rum, ice cold and fresh from the freezer.
2. Add the lime juice, about a quarter-lime worth.
   
3. You want a good amount of ice. Add 6 or so cubes at a time and crush them with with the rum and juice on a low setting. Doing it on too high of a setting will give you an unusable ice-sludge that will melt too quickly and give you a weak drink.
4. Add the Jones Soda and stir it into the pitcher. DO NOT turn on the blender after adding the Soda, it will foam up and give you the mess of a lifetime!
5. Rim a good glass with a lime wedge and garnish.
6. Pour.
7. Drink
8. Enjoy
9. Stumble
10. Apologize
11. Repeat.

This is best consumed in proximity to hot sand and in view of a cool, cleansing coastline.

The Hemingway Daquri

• 1 1/2 oz Light Rum
• 1/4 oz Maraschino liqueur
• 3/4 oz Lime juice
• 1/4 oz Grapefruit juice
  

Mixing instructions:

Shake with ice and strain into a chilled cocktail glass.

Ernie H. had an economy of words and also his drinks had an economy of process and adornment. I clearly, do not. I still love him.

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